Tuesday, February 7, 2012

How to Drive Like an Israeli

Follow these easy rules to quickly learn how to drive like an Israeli:
  1. Use your horn as much as possible. The more noise you make, the faster traffic moves. It's a fact.
  2.  Don't use your turn signals. You are the only driver on the road so using these are just a waste of time. Plus using your turn signals is like wearing a big sign on your head that you are a foreigner.
  3. Along with #2, merge lanes as much as possible and as quickly as possible. The more lanes you cross = more points and more points = winning!
  4. If there is a pedestrian in the cross walk, don't stop. Instead try to get as close as possible to the person to scare them off. As we all know, cars have the right of way so pedestrians should move for you. Plus, the closer you get to a pedestrian = more points and more points = winning!
  5. You may have heard that it's near impossible to find parking in Tel Aviv. This is a blatant lie! There is plenty of unoccupied sidewalk all over the city! If there are people on the sidewalk, just honk your horn and continue to park, they will move out of your way.
Now everyone will think you are a local, until you open your mouth that is!

No comments:

Post a Comment